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Digg it UP - Committed Relationships: Use Them to Grow Towards Self-Understanding and True Love
Several years ago I began an online business.At the time, the field I was entering was not all that crowded, search engine algorithms were much easier to manipulate, and links from relevent sites were not too tough to come by.In short - if you wanted traffic, and were willing to do a little footwork, you could get it.Over the past few years, things have changed.Almost by accident, I stumbled upon a method for increasing, quite dramatically, the number of visitors to my website.It turns out that almost everybody can design a really cool website...but very few people can write an interesting article. Writing is not a skill which is crucial in todays world, and very few can do it well.(I, on the other hand, have the opposite problem...it's one of the few thing I can do well)So, what is a webmaster to do if he wants to provide well written content to his visitors? Obviously, he needs to get some
3. Analyze arguments, NOT from the point of view of how egotistical, horrible, jealous, or domineering, etc. your partner is, but from the point of view of what the argument is telling you about YOURSELF. The other may indeed be all those things, but it is much less important to dwell on their failings than on your own possibility for growth by observing your reactions to whatever is occurring.
4. Use that knowledge to change, grow, and learn that you always have a choice in your reaction to any situation.
5. Become very aware of yourself at ALL times…watch the times you would like to prevaricate, or at least, tell things in a way that is not 100% the real way, and try to discover why…are you afraid you will not be accepted or loved if you show your real self?
6. Particularly watch those relationships that have an imbalance of power … if you are top dog … ask yourself what you get out of it … if you are on the bottom ... why you are willing to be there … the answer to all of this serves your growth … remember, it takes two to tango!
7. Develop a sense of self by filling your own needs rather than by trying to fill them through others. Love yourself first!
8. Observe yourself in a love relationship on the basis of this article.
Copyright 2006 by Gabriella Kortsch, Ph.D.
The author grants reprint permission to opt-in publications and websites so long as the copyright and by-line are included intact and the article is not us
If you're looking for the best way to make money from home online, you may know that creating and selling your own ebooks is the fastest way to online success. It may seem intimidating, but if you follow a few detailed steps, you'll be able to create your own ebook in as little as a week.Find A Niche The first step in ebook creation is finding something to write about. If this is your first ebook, you may want to choose a subject that you are passionate about, even if it's not the most profitable subject. It's a lot easier to write about what you know rather than a subject you know nothing about.Browse through magazines to find niches, or search online for ideas. When choosing your niche, ask yourself if it's a topic that people are readily spending money on.Find An Angle for Your Ebook Now that you have a niche, it's time to determine what you'll be writing about. Visit forums in your nich
Relationships Free of Dependence
This less appealing reality actually holds the key for a true loving relationship that is free of dependence on the other. Jung wrote: “The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.” In a nutshell, transformation is what relationships are all about. We remain in relationships while the going is good, but often break off at the first sign of trouble. If the person we love turns out differently than our initial estimation of them, we feel they led us to believe something about their character that was not true, or, that we simply can not trust our judgment.
Relationships Based on Complementarity Rather Than on Need
But the crux of the matter is quite different. It is precisely at this problematic point in the relationship that we have the chance of creating a relationship based on mutual complementarity rather than on need; a free relationship between two people who want to be together, rather than two people who need to be together.
So how do we get there?
Awareness
A very important step in this process is becoming aware of ourselves; gaining insight into ourselves. Another step involves filling our own “holes”, our needs, rather than hoping to fill them through others. Clearly this is easier said than done. It literally means growing into wholeness – a lifelong process.
Filling Our Needs
Our needs get us into most relationship problems. We seek out people, consciously or unconsciously, that fulfill our needs, rather than filling our needs ourselves. Whenever we obsess about someone, feeling that we can not live without them, we should examine what it is that is missing in us very carefully, what we feel others are “giving” us, and why we feel that we need them for our very survival. This element is being shown to us through the relationship, the obsession, the need, the desire to control and possess. If we could only become aware of this, we might still suffer, but we would have finally found the real road to freedom from this kind of dependent need.
Jungian Transformation Motifs
A. The Shadow
Most individuals are unaware of the shadow, an unconscious part of the psyche which has not been lived out. C.G. Jung believed that the more people truly know themselves by looking into themselves, the more society as a whole becomes conscious. Children are often taught not to show – or even feel - their objectionable and aggressive urges. Although they must be taught not to act out these urges, they often wind up repressing all conscious knowledge of these negative aspects until they are buried so deep that they manage to forget their existence. Thus, they believe their chosen conscious attitude is who they really are.
But the negative aspects have not disappeared – they have moved into the unconscious where they can cause all kinds of trouble when the shadow forces its way into outer behavior. You might, for example, say the opposite of what you meant to say. Often, unrecognized aspects of the self are what you notice in other people: these are projections.
The best clue to the existence of shadow aspects is the level of emotion you have about another person’s behavior. Until the content of the projection becomes conscious, projections continue to occur in a compulsive manner accompanied by intense emotion. But of course as long as it is a projection, you feel that the problem lies with the other person, never realizing that precisely because of your strong emotional reaction to the other person, the problem – or issue to be resolved – lies with you (whether or not the other person’s behavior is acceptable is immaterial to this).
B. The Anima and Animus
Jung felt that everyone has a psychological contrasexual reality represented by the opposite sex. The anima (Latin term for soul or spirit), the feminine figure in a man’s psyche, represents unconscious qualities. The flesh and blood women in his real life are a source of information for a man about those things for which he has no eyes.
The animus is the masculine figure in a woman’s psyche, symbolizing new creativity or potential within, as well as rigidity, obstinacy, absolute convictions, or a sense of personal worthlessness.
Projection
We are always attracted to an outer man or woman who somehow embodies not yet lived out or realized (and therefore projected) aspects of our own anima or animus. We actually fall in love with ourselves via the projection, i.e. with bits of ourselves we have not yet seen, and so we feel we need the other person because they are able to express what we cannot.
Since all of this is unconscious, it generally takes a falling away of the rosy glasses and a return to reality to force us into pain and frustration, making us begin the process of self-awareness, understanding, and thereby the process of growth towards the incorporation of these needs and then to fulfill them ourselves, and move towards a degree of wholeness from whence we can approach relationships very differently, and with a far greater measure of inner freedom.
Suggestions for Improving Your Relationships: A Plan to Follow
1. Realize that attraction, love, chemistry, and emotion, come about due to the psycho-emotional and spiritual makeup of your inner man or woman precisely in order that you may work on these and develop further. It is your psyche’s way of helping to make you whole. That is why relationships are of such enormous importance in personal growth and development.
2. Always watch any kind of “affect” (emotion, both negative and positive) … it gives strong clues to where you need to work on something (even if it proves the other person is a heel). But if you were “whole”, your affect would not get involved.
3. Analyze arguments, NOT from the point of view of how egotistical, horrible, jealous, or domineering, etc. your partner is, but from the point of view of what the argument is telling you about YOURSELF. The other may indeed be all those things, but it is much less important to dwell on their failings than on your own possibility for growth by observing your reactions to whatever is occurring.
4. Use that knowledge to change, grow, and learn that you always have a choice in your reaction to any situation.
5. Become very aware of yourself at ALL times…watch the times you would like to prevaricate, or at least, tell things in a way that is not 100% the real way, and try to discover why…are you afraid you will not be accepted or loved if you show your real self?
6. Particularly watch those relationships that have an imbalance of power … if you are top dog … ask yourself what you get out of it … if you are on the bottom ... why you are willing to be there … the answer to all of this serves your growth … remember, it takes two to tango!
7. Develop a sense of self by filling your own needs rather than by trying to fill them through others. Love yourself first!
8. Observe yourself in a love relationship on the basis of this article.
Copyright 2006 by Gabriella Kortsch, Ph.D.
The author grants reprint permission to opt-in publications and websites so long as the copyright and by-line are included intact and the article is not use
Home Refinance Tip #1 Having a second mortgageRefinancing a home that has a second mortgage over it will most likely leave you paying back more than you would need to under your original home loan. It is worth remembering that lenders look less favourably at homes with second mortgages, especially if the second home loan was taken out to help repay other bills.Home Refinance Tip #2 Your debt to income ratioRefinancing your home loan follows the same process as your initial mortgage application, where a low debt to income ratio is important in gaining finance approval. A high debt to income ratio will limit your chances of approval for refinancing your home loan, and in the unlikely event it is approved, the terms are likely to be so costly that taking the refinance option would not be worthwhile.Home Refinance Tip #3 Poor or bad credit ratingThe single largest reason for denial of refinancing applications
Filling Our Needs
Our needs get us into most relationship problems. We seek out people, consciously or unconsciously, that fulfill our needs, rather than filling our needs ourselves. Whenever we obsess about someone, feeling that we can not live without them, we should examine what it is that is missing in us very carefully, what we feel others are “giving” us, and why we feel that we need them for our very survival. This element is being shown to us through the relationship, the obsession, the need, the desire to control and possess. If we could only become aware of this, we might still suffer, but we would have finally found the real road to freedom from this kind of dependent need.
Jungian Transformation Motifs
A. The Shadow
Most individuals are unaware of the shadow, an unconscious part of the psyche which has not been lived out. C.G. Jung believed that the more people truly know themselves by looking into themselves, the more society as a whole becomes conscious. Children are often taught not to show – or even feel - their objectionable and aggressive urges. Although they must be taught not to act out these urges, they often wind up repressing all conscious knowledge of these negative aspects until they are buried so deep that they manage to forget their existence. Thus, they believe their chosen conscious attitude is who they really are.
But the negative aspects have not disappeared – they have moved into the unconscious where they can cause all kinds of trouble when the shadow forces its way into outer behavior. You might, for example, say the opposite of what you meant to say. Often, unrecognized aspects of the self are what you notice in other people: these are projections.
The best clue to the existence of shadow aspects is the level of emotion you have about another person’s behavior. Until the content of the projection becomes conscious, projections continue to occur in a compulsive manner accompanied by intense emotion. But of course as long as it is a projection, you feel that the problem lies with the other person, never realizing that precisely because of your strong emotional reaction to the other person, the problem – or issue to be resolved – lies with you (whether or not the other person’s behavior is acceptable is immaterial to this).
B. The Anima and Animus
Jung felt that everyone has a psychological contrasexual reality represented by the opposite sex. The anima (Latin term for soul or spirit), the feminine figure in a man’s psyche, represents unconscious qualities. The flesh and blood women in his real life are a source of information for a man about those things for which he has no eyes.
The animus is the masculine figure in a woman’s psyche, symbolizing new creativity or potential within, as well as rigidity, obstinacy, absolute convictions, or a sense of personal worthlessness.
Projection
We are always attracted to an outer man or woman who somehow embodies not yet lived out or realized (and therefore projected) aspects of our own anima or animus. We actually fall in love with ourselves via the projection, i.e. with bits of ourselves we have not yet seen, and so we feel we need the other person because they are able to express what we cannot.
Since all of this is unconscious, it generally takes a falling away of the rosy glasses and a return to reality to force us into pain and frustration, making us begin the process of self-awareness, understanding, and thereby the process of growth towards the incorporation of these needs and then to fulfill them ourselves, and move towards a degree of wholeness from whence we can approach relationships very differently, and with a far greater measure of inner freedom.
Suggestions for Improving Your Relationships: A Plan to Follow
1. Realize that attraction, love, chemistry, and emotion, come about due to the psycho-emotional and spiritual makeup of your inner man or woman precisely in order that you may work on these and develop further. It is your psyche’s way of helping to make you whole. That is why relationships are of such enormous importance in personal growth and development.
2. Always watch any kind of “affect” (emotion, both negative and positive) … it gives strong clues to where you need to work on something (even if it proves the other person is a heel). But if you were “whole”, your affect would not get involved.
3. Analyze arguments, NOT from the point of view of how egotistical, horrible, jealous, or domineering, etc. your partner is, but from the point of view of what the argument is telling you about YOURSELF. The other may indeed be all those things, but it is much less important to dwell on their failings than on your own possibility for growth by observing your reactions to whatever is occurring.
4. Use that knowledge to change, grow, and learn that you always have a choice in your reaction to any situation.
5. Become very aware of yourself at ALL times…watch the times you would like to prevaricate, or at least, tell things in a way that is not 100% the real way, and try to discover why…are you afraid you will not be accepted or loved if you show your real self?
6. Particularly watch those relationships that have an imbalance of power … if you are top dog … ask yourself what you get out of it … if you are on the bottom ... why you are willing to be there … the answer to all of this serves your growth … remember, it takes two to tango!
7. Develop a sense of self by filling your own needs rather than by trying to fill them through others. Love yourself first!
8. Observe yourself in a love relationship on the basis of this article.
Copyright 2006 by Gabriella Kortsch, Ph.D.
The author grants reprint permission to opt-in publications and websites so long as the copyright and by-line are included intact and the article is not us
On wish lists around the country, home electronics have bypassed traditional favorites like clothes, lingerie, and jewelry as the most coveted items. But whether you're buying home electronics for yourself and your family, or as a gift, the burning question is always: Where do I find hot deals?After all, why pay premium prices for LCD flat screen TVs, an iPod, a digital camera, or a cell phone when you can get hot deals at a fraction of the cost? While it's true that the prices for all home electronics are trending downward, it pays to shop around for the best possible prices before you make a purchase.LCD Flat Screen TVs: Although LCD flat screen TVs for home entertainment systems are massive and relatively expensive, portable LCD flat screen TVs are ultimately affordable - especially when you can find hot deals and discount prices. For example, a seven-inch LCD flat screen TV with a full channel VHF/UHF receiver, bu
But the negative aspects have not disappeared – they have moved into the unconscious where they can cause all kinds of trouble when the shadow forces its way into outer behavior. You might, for example, say the opposite of what you meant to say. Often, unrecognized aspects of the self are what you notice in other people: these are projections.
The best clue to the existence of shadow aspects is the level of emotion you have about another person’s behavior. Until the content of the projection becomes conscious, projections continue to occur in a compulsive manner accompanied by intense emotion. But of course as long as it is a projection, you feel that the problem lies with the other person, never realizing that precisely because of your strong emotional reaction to the other person, the problem – or issue to be resolved – lies with you (whether or not the other person’s behavior is acceptable is immaterial to this).
B. The Anima and Animus
Jung felt that everyone has a psychological contrasexual reality represented by the opposite sex. The anima (Latin term for soul or spirit), the feminine figure in a man’s psyche, represents unconscious qualities. The flesh and blood women in his real life are a source of information for a man about those things for which he has no eyes.
The animus is the masculine figure in a woman’s psyche, symbolizing new creativity or potential within, as well as rigidity, obstinacy, absolute convictions, or a sense of personal worthlessness.
Projection
We are always attracted to an outer man or woman who somehow embodies not yet lived out or realized (and therefore projected) aspects of our own anima or animus. We actually fall in love with ourselves via the projection, i.e. with bits of ourselves we have not yet seen, and so we feel we need the other person because they are able to express what we cannot.
Since all of this is unconscious, it generally takes a falling away of the rosy glasses and a return to reality to force us into pain and frustration, making us begin the process of self-awareness, understanding, and thereby the process of growth towards the incorporation of these needs and then to fulfill them ourselves, and move towards a degree of wholeness from whence we can approach relationships very differently, and with a far greater measure of inner freedom.
Suggestions for Improving Your Relationships: A Plan to Follow
1. Realize that attraction, love, chemistry, and emotion, come about due to the psycho-emotional and spiritual makeup of your inner man or woman precisely in order that you may work on these and develop further. It is your psyche’s way of helping to make you whole. That is why relationships are of such enormous importance in personal growth and development.
2. Always watch any kind of “affect” (emotion, both negative and positive) … it gives strong clues to where you need to work on something (even if it proves the other person is a heel). But if you were “whole”, your affect would not get involved.
3. Analyze arguments, NOT from the point of view of how egotistical, horrible, jealous, or domineering, etc. your partner is, but from the point of view of what the argument is telling you about YOURSELF. The other may indeed be all those things, but it is much less important to dwell on their failings than on your own possibility for growth by observing your reactions to whatever is occurring.
4. Use that knowledge to change, grow, and learn that you always have a choice in your reaction to any situation.
5. Become very aware of yourself at ALL times…watch the times you would like to prevaricate, or at least, tell things in a way that is not 100% the real way, and try to discover why…are you afraid you will not be accepted or loved if you show your real self?
6. Particularly watch those relationships that have an imbalance of power … if you are top dog … ask yourself what you get out of it … if you are on the bottom ... why you are willing to be there … the answer to all of this serves your growth … remember, it takes two to tango!
7. Develop a sense of self by filling your own needs rather than by trying to fill them through others. Love yourself first!
8. Observe yourself in a love relationship on the basis of this article.
Copyright 2006 by Gabriella Kortsch, Ph.D.
The author grants reprint permission to opt-in publications and websites so long as the copyright and by-line are included intact and the article is not us
HSAs have a “triple” tax advantage from a federal tax standpoint. Individuals receive full tax advantages for HSAs on their Federal Income Tax return (or through a salary reduction program in certain employer-sponsored settings) regardless of particular state’s tax treatment of HSAs.An account beneficiary may take an above-the-line deduction (i.e. the amounts may be used to determine the individual’s adjusted gross income before any itemized or standard deductions are considered) for contributions made to an HSA during any month of the individual’s taxable year that the individual is eligible. The permitted deduction cannot exceed the sum of the “monthly limitations” for such months. In 2006, the monthly limitation for any month is 1/12th of the following amounts:- For those with single coverage on the first day of the month, the lesser of the annual deductible under the HDHP or $2,700.- For those with family covera
Projection
We are always attracted to an outer man or woman who somehow embodies not yet lived out or realized (and therefore projected) aspects of our own anima or animus. We actually fall in love with ourselves via the projection, i.e. with bits of ourselves we have not yet seen, and so we feel we need the other person because they are able to express what we cannot.
Since all of this is unconscious, it generally takes a falling away of the rosy glasses and a return to reality to force us into pain and frustration, making us begin the process of self-awareness, understanding, and thereby the process of growth towards the incorporation of these needs and then to fulfill them ourselves, and move towards a degree of wholeness from whence we can approach relationships very differently, and with a far greater measure of inner freedom.
Suggestions for Improving Your Relationships: A Plan to Follow
1. Realize that attraction, love, chemistry, and emotion, come about due to the psycho-emotional and spiritual makeup of your inner man or woman precisely in order that you may work on these and develop further. It is your psyche’s way of helping to make you whole. That is why relationships are of such enormous importance in personal growth and development.
2. Always watch any kind of “affect” (emotion, both negative and positive) … it gives strong clues to where you need to work on something (even if it proves the other person is a heel). But if you were “whole”, your affect would not get involved.
3. Analyze arguments, NOT from the point of view of how egotistical, horrible, jealous, or domineering, etc. your partner is, but from the point of view of what the argument is telling you about YOURSELF. The other may indeed be all those things, but it is much less important to dwell on their failings than on your own possibility for growth by observing your reactions to whatever is occurring.
4. Use that knowledge to change, grow, and learn that you always have a choice in your reaction to any situation.
5. Become very aware of yourself at ALL times…watch the times you would like to prevaricate, or at least, tell things in a way that is not 100% the real way, and try to discover why…are you afraid you will not be accepted or loved if you show your real self?
6. Particularly watch those relationships that have an imbalance of power … if you are top dog … ask yourself what you get out of it … if you are on the bottom ... why you are willing to be there … the answer to all of this serves your growth … remember, it takes two to tango!
7. Develop a sense of self by filling your own needs rather than by trying to fill them through others. Love yourself first!
8. Observe yourself in a love relationship on the basis of this article.
Copyright 2006 by Gabriella Kortsch, Ph.D.
The author grants reprint permission to opt-in publications and websites so long as the copyright and by-line are included intact and the article is not us
A recent news release issued by Uranium Resources (OTC BB: URRE), emphasizes the underlying stress this uranium bull market is creating for utilities. The company’s appears to confirm that spot uranium prices should run much higher over, at least, the short term. Uranium Resources announced it was restructuring its long-term sales contracts in order to establish a “market related” contract with Itochu Corporation. This the multi-national Japanese-based conglomerate has more than 150 offices in 80 countries and over 4,000 employees. This should give Uranium Resources a strong boost in the international uranium mining community, which is growing more populated each month.On February 10th, we talked to Paul Willmott, chairman and chief executive of Uranium Resources about the nature of the current uranium cycle. He told us, “…everybody is entering into ‘market related contracts,’ which is the price at the time of delivery. Because it’s
3. Analyze arguments, NOT from the point of view of how egotistical, horrible, jealous, or domineering, etc. your partner is, but from the point of view of what the argument is telling you about YOURSELF. The other may indeed be all those things, but it is much less important to dwell on their failings than on your own possibility for growth by observing your reactions to whatever is occurring.
4. Use that knowledge to change, grow, and learn that you always have a choice in your reaction to any situation.
5. Become very aware of yourself at ALL times…watch the times you would like to prevaricate, or at least, tell things in a way that is not 100% the real way, and try to discover why…are you afraid you will not be accepted or loved if you show your real self?
6. Particularly watch those relationships that have an imbalance of power … if you are top dog … ask yourself what you get out of it … if you are on the bottom ... why you are willing to be there … the answer to all of this serves your growth … remember, it takes two to tango!
7. Develop a sense of self by filling your own needs rather than by trying to fill them through others. Love yourself first!
8. Observe yourself in a love relationship on the basis of this article.
Copyright 2006 by Gabriella Kortsch, Ph.D.
The author grants reprint permission to opt-in publications and websites so long as the copyright and by-line are included intact and the article is not used in spam.
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