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Digg it UP - Divorce: Doing the Right Thing for the Children
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The most difficult thing about divorce involving children is that you are now forced to continue a relationship with someone you either don’t get along with or that doesn’t function in the same way as you. On top of that, as easy as it would be to simply part ways, there is more than a property to settle on.
Studies have shown that divorce is not traumatic for children. Yet it is what occurs after the divorce that creates a traumatic experience. Being truly loved by both parents, regardless of whether they live under the same roof or not, is what affects them most.
But how do you stay focused on that love when you have a mix of emotions on a daily basis? How do you remove yourself from the upset that your ex-spouse imposes upon you? It’s challenging, but can be done by breaking down the simple steps of becoming co-parents:
1- Remind yourself daily that your job as a parent has not changed.
2- Visualize your role as co-parents with two hands out in front of you. Hands that will hold different things. One hand will hold the emotions you feel, while the other will hold what you will do. Close the emotional hand tightly and do what the other hand tells you to do, accepting that they won’t be the same any lon
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Studies have shown that divorce is not traumatic for children. Yet it is what occurs after the divorce that creates a traumatic experience. Being truly loved by both parents, regardless of whether they live under the same roof or not, is what affects them most.
But how do you stay focused on that love when you have a mix of emotions on a daily basis? How do you remove yourself from the upset that your ex-spouse imposes upon you? It’s challenging, but can be done by breaking down the simple steps of becoming co-parents:
1- Remind yourself daily that your job as a parent has not changed.
2- Visualize your role as co-parents with two hands out in front of you. Hands that will hold different things. One hand will hold the emotions you feel, while the other will hold what you will do. Close the emotional hand tightly and do what the other hand tells you to do, accepting that they won’t be the same any lo
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But how do you stay focused on that love when you have a mix of emotions on a daily basis? How do you remove yourself from the upset that your ex-spouse imposes upon you? It’s challenging, but can be done by breaking down the simple steps of becoming co-parents:
1- Remind yourself daily that your job as a parent has not changed.
2- Visualize your role as co-parents with two hands out in front of you. Hands that will hold different things. One hand will hold the emotions you feel, while the other will hold what you will do. Close the emotional hand tightly and do what the other hand tells you to do, accepting that they won’t be the same any lo
There’s more pressure on people than ever before to save for their futures. Relying on the state is no longer a safe option for retirement, benefits and healthcare. As a result, an increasing number of people are purchasing personal financial products such as life insuranc
1- Remind yourself daily that your job as a parent has not changed.
2- Visualize your role as co-parents with two hands out in front of you. Hands that will hold different things. One hand will hold the emotions you feel, while the other will hold what you will do. Close the emotional hand tightly and do what the other hand tells you to do, accepting that they won’t be the same any lo
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3- If you have anger for your ex-spouse, compartmentalize it and keep visualizing your children’s’ faces. These are the lives that you are impacting now.
4- Remember that even though you don’t need your ex-spouse, your children do.
5- Accept that the things that bother you about your ex-spouse are not things that bother your children.
Different can be good or bad, but you can impact the direction it goes. If it’s going to be different anyway, why not choose to make it something better than it has ever been? And when things seem really, really hard, look deep into those children’s eyes and remember who you are for them as a parent.
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