Most marriages that are troubled have these giver and receiver roles firmly fixed. In marriages that are happy, these roles will fluctuate between the partners regularly, depending on where the need is greatest. Where does most of your energy go during a normal day?

Curiosity doesn't always kill the cat. As Isaac Asimov wrote in his New Guide to Science, 'almost in the beginning was curiosity'. Now, relationships are as far removed from science as a Van der Graaf generator is from a blender, but the same rule applies.